Reflections....

We still don't have a computer and recently we went to Ben's mission reunion and I left our camera at Ben's mission president's house. So I still don't have pictures to post yet. I will have lots to post once I can get it back and have time. But I use this blog as a family journal and I wanted to capture some thoughts I had been having lately. They came to me the other day as I was nursing Isaac and he was under a blanket with just his little feet sticking out. He was a kicking away and it just struck me how cute it was. I really wanted to remember that feeling because it goes away so fast. My days now are being spent at home since I didn't go back to work after the baby and I just seem to be going from one thing to the next. I tend to get so overwhelmed and stressed and hurried and everything else. But there really are some sweet moments.

-Seeing the face of my 2 month old as he watches his mobile above his changing crib and even though it's broke and doesn't turn, he still loves hearing the music and laughs and smiles. Jeremy keeps saying that Isaac is just too happy! I don't think you can be too happy!!

-Watching as my 3 year old Alex goes into preschool and how excited he is when he gets done and to be able to tell me all about his day. And after wondering if he would ever potty train and just 2 sticker charts and he was wearing underwear (he still hasn't mastered the #2 part but we take what we can get!). Watching him play with a doll we borrowed for something I was doing and how he loved playing with it and I realized I may never have a little girl to play with dolls but my boys still like them!

-And my 6 year old Jeremy having a tooth loose for weeks on end and asking me what seemed every hour, "Is it loose enough Mom? " "No son but you will know when it is." And then having his trust to finally pull it out and the look of surprise as it comes right out without hurting (even though that happened with his other 2 teeth. And watching him as we go to school lunch and volunteering at his school and seeing him interact with other kids. I wonder when did he get so tall?!

-So many other things to think about. But most of all, I am thankful to my husband for telling me that he doesn't want me to go back to work and that we will make it somehow. And for the first time in my life, I put my trust in God that he will take care of us so that I can see these sweet kids grow up. I have always tried to control everything but kids make you realize you don't have control of anything! And they depend on you for their whole world and that is a great feeling!